DO YOU HAVE A BURNING QUESTION?

Ask JB Dath—He’s Seen and heard (Almost) Everything

Family law can feel like wandering into a legal jungle without a map. Whether you’re wrestling with paperwork or tangled emotions, I’m here to help. And I've seen and heard it all!

Here are some of the questions I hear most often (and my honest answers).

Q1: Do I really need a lawyer for my divorce, or can I handle it myself?

A: Ah, the brave soul’s question! DIY divorce is technically possible—and in some simpler cases, it’s perfectly fine. But remember: divorce paperwork is similar to Ikea furniture. One wrong screw—or clause—and the whole thing might collapse, potentially costing you far more than legal fees would have.

I am in the process of writing a DIY Divorce Book with my wife, so stay tuned for more details on this in the coming months. This will be a guide, which will help those interested in trying to navigate the paperwork on their own. If your case is simple, amicable, and you both agree on everything (including who gets the dog and the vinyl collection), DIY might work. Otherwise, having an attorney means fewer headaches, fewer surprises, and a much higher chance of keeping your financial future intact.

Or possibly consider a dual approach. Hire me for a strategy session or a flat fee Divorce on a limited scope.

Divorce is not a one size fits all. Your situation is as unique as you are!

Q2: What exactly is mediation, and do I have to sit in a room with my ex?

A: Mediation is basically a negotiation with a referee—except the referee wears business casual instead of a striped shirt. It’s a way to resolve issues like custody, property division, and support without going to war in court. As a licensed Attorney in the entire state of California, I am pleased to offer ONLINE MEDIATION for anyone who resides in the state.

If you are local, then Yes, you’ll typically be in the same building as your ex…but no, you don’t have to sit face-to-face if it’s too stressful. Many mediators offer separate rooms, video calls, or tag-team negotiations. It’s kinder on your wallet and your blood pressure. And hey, if it works, you’ll save yourself months (and thousands) in litigation.

Q3: How do I get a restraining order, and how fast can it happen?

A: First, let me say this: if you feel unsafe, don’t wait. Help is available immediately. A restraining order (sometimes called a protective order) is a legal shield to keep someone away from you, your home, your work, or your kids.

In California, you can get an emergency protective order in hours, even the same day, if needed. The process can move fast—but it’s paperwork-heavy and emotionally draining. That’s why having an attorney helps you get it right, keep your safety intact, and avoid missteps that could delay your protection.

Q4: How is child custody decided? Is it true the court always favors moms?

A: Ah, the rumor mill! Once upon a time, California courts leaned heavily toward awarding custody to mothers. Today? Not so much. California law is gender-neutral and focuses on “the best interests of the child.”

Judges consider factors like who’s been the primary caregiver, each parent’s living situation, stability, and sometimes (depending on age) the child’s wishes. It’s not about who makes better spaghetti—it’s about who can provide the safest, healthiest, most stable environment. Dads absolutely have a fighting chance, and so do grandparents or other guardians in certain cases.

Q5: Is litigation really as awful as people say?

A: Let’s be honest: litigation can be… dramatic. Think courtroom drama meets paperwork avalanche. It’s expensive, public, and often stressful. But sometimes, it’s the only way to protect your rights or stand up for what’s fair—especially if the other side refuses to cooperate.

If we end up in court, know this: I’ll prepare like I’m going into the World Cup Finals (old soccer habits die hard). I’ll fight fiercely for your interests—but I’ll also tell you straight if we have options to avoid the courtroom. I have a proven track record of success in the courtroom and would be happy to provide you with past clients who can confirm that I am indeed a fighter for what is right.

Got More Burning Questions?

This is just the tip of the iceberg. If your brain’s buzzing with “what ifs,” call me at (530) 574-2076 or send me a message and let’s chat. JBDATHLAW@GMAIL.com

At Nor Cal Divorce Law, I’m here to turn the chaos of family law into clarity—and maybe even crack a smile along the way. Your next chapter is waiting. Let’s write it together.